Archive for the ‘television’ Category

Some books are to be tasted, others to be swallowed

Guys, I’ve stresslined out over Chew in the past, but in a nutshell: Tony Chu is a detective who gets psychic impressions from the things he eats, and he solves crimes by eating things. It’s as amazing as it sounds. And now iFanboy is saying that Showtime is going to turn it into a TV series. That is wonderful news! I think the material will work really well as a series and Showtime is the perfect network for a project like this, just because Tony Chu sometimes eats, uh, people and it can be a bit gruesome.

In light of this announcement, I’d like to formally nominate Ken Leung for the role of Tony Chu.

You may remember Ken Leung from his role as Miles the psychic detective on the hit show Hey We’re Lost. So he’d pretty much be playing the exact same character except with a tad more cannibalism. Cast Josh Holloway as Chu’s partner and we can just pretend this is the Miles/Sawyer buddy cop show that everyone wants to see. Make it happen, Showtime!


Detective Comix Featuring Monk

Have you ever loved something so very much… but for all the wrong reasons?  I’ve recently been watching this show Monk, about a detective with OCD.  It was all the rage with retired people and housewives years ago, but I didn’t pay much attention to it until I burned through all the good TV on Netflix.  Monk is a perfectly acceptable television show — that is to say there’s nothing wrong with it — but each episode follows a very strict template.  Detective Monk’s keen observation skills allow him to discover the true culprit of an otherwise perfect crime.  In fact, half the time he confronts the criminal with “It would have been the perfect crime, but you forgot one thing…”  I find that hilarious.  Probably too hilarious.

Much to the annoyance of my friends, I’ve been constantly prefacing random facts with the statement.

“It would have been the perfect crime, but you forgot one thing: salamanders are colorblind.”

“It would have been the perfect crime, but you forgot one thing: George Washington died on December 14, 1799. There’s no way you could have had lunch with him on the day in question.”

“It would have been the perfect crime, but you forgot one thing: automobiles run on gasoline, not orange juice.”

Try it,  it’s fun!  I’ve also been making image macros, because those are like currency on the internet.  If the producers of Monk are reading this, you guys should know that I’ve got a million of these.  Here’s my pitch: a robot detective with OCD in space.  Bam! That’s television’s next Firefly right there.

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Garmonbozia is actually just regurgitated pie

Last Friday was the opening of The Black Dog Runs At Night, a Twin Peaks themed gallery show at Piranha Betty’s Art Mart in Kensington. As you may know, faithful reader, I am a hardcore Twin Peaks fan… enough so that I was willing to travel to Kensington, which is not at all safe, just to check out this show. I took a few crappy cellphone pictures that I thought I’d share.

The main gallery area had been done up to resemble the Black Lodge, straight down to the zig-zag floor. There’s a log hidden somewhere in the above picture… try and find it!

In addition to art, there was a pie tasting, because all people ever seem to associate Twin Peaks with is pie and coffee. I did not try any pie, because it did not look at all appetizing by the time I got to the show.

The art itself was fairly average. Nothing jumped out at me as being amazing, save for a couple dioramas I didn’t get good pictures of. It was mostly fan art, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I did ended up buying a few smaller drawings that I liked. The above picture shows how they were marked as sold. The gallery manager just plastered my name and phone number next to the work for some reason. So far I’ve had half a dozen unsolicited text messages, mostly Twin Peaks quotes. Thanks, Piranha Betty’s!

Final Verdict: there is no reason to ever visit Kensington. Except I have to go back when the show closes to pick up the drawings that I bought. I will most likely just give my roommate five dollars to go pick them up. No one ever messes with him. He’s got crazy eyes.


The Bogus Carrot of Possible Reconciliation

Hey, remember that British television show Spaced? The one by Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg and
Jessica Hynes? From back in the day, when we were kids. It was really great and quite funny.

Apparently there was an American pilot produced for Spaced, and some footage has surfaced on YouTube as part of an actor’s demo reel. It’s… uh, exactly the same. It’s almost a shot for shot remake of the first episode but with different actors. Just to compare, here’s the exact same scene from the British version. It’s quite painful to watch the American remake after that. Sort of like going to visit the house you grew up in after new owners moved in. It feels so familiar, but there’s something off about it that just makes you uncomfortable.

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